i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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