Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
