there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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