talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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