i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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