But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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