I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
