What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Boobs speak an international language.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
