whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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