YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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