I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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