Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
