Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Randomize