I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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