I want to have your abortion
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I'm like, not good at living.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize