How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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