just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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