dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Randomize
