Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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