Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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