This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
