He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
