Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
