a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
