So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
the raccoons are back...
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