There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
