You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
