Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
