holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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