I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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