And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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