No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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