there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
