ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize