It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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