just tell him i said nine months
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
