Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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