so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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