i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
