I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I believe in your delicious
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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