Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
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