You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
