So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
