i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
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