do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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