Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
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