please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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