U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
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