That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
