Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
