Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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